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Sep 14, 2009 -- 13 things a burglar won't tell you

Reader's Digest recently ran an article titled "13 Things a Burglar Won't Tell You" that offers some sobering caveats from convicted burglars.

Below are excerpts:

• Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning your carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator.

• Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in your yard last week. While I was in there, I unlatched the back window to make my return a little easier.

• Love those flowers. That tells me you have taste … and taste means there are nice things inside.

• Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up on the driveway.

• If it snows while you’re out of town, get a neighbor to create car and foot tracks into the house.

• If decorative glass is part of your front entrance, don’t let your alarm company install the control pad where I can see if it’s set.

• A good security company alarms the window over the sink. And the windows on the second floor, which often access the master bedroom—and your jewelry.

• It’s raining, you’re fumbling with your umbrella, and you forget to lock your door—understandable. But understand this: I don’t take a day off because of bad weather.

• I always knock first. If you answer, I’ll ask for directions somewhere or offer to clean your gutters.

• Do you really think I won’t look in your sock drawer?

• Here’s a helpful hint: I almost never go into kids’ rooms.

• You’re right: I won’t have enough time to break into that safe where you keep your valuables. But if it’s not bolted down, I’ll take it with me.

• A loud TV or radio can be a better deterrent than the best alarm system.

Unfortunately, Clark won't be able to answer any questions submitted via commenting. If you have a question, please try posting it to our message boards.

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What others are saying

  • Security Systems Work
    I have been around too long to know better. Alarm systems DO work if used properly. They have to be cell back up units because now a days phone lines are being cut. Stop acting like Billy Bob with a gun. People will not break in your house when you are there. That is a given. But if they do come in you want the police to be notified. I don't care how great you are with a gun, People crazy enough to go into your house while you are there will shoot you just the same because they are crazier than you in the first place. Dogs are great deterrents but they can be poisoned. Unless you have an fully automatic m-16 don't bother taking on them. and oh yeah.. guns is the first thing they take iven if locked.
  • Garage Sale
    There was an attempted break-in at 2AM at our house this morning. Just last weekend my husband and I had a garage sale. Can't help but feel it was someone from there. The policeman said our neighborhood is pretty quiet and only has domestic calls. We have an average home and yard, nothing that screams money. Thank God for keeping us safe!
  • Home Secure
    I just had a "security system company" claim to be offering me a free security system if I just put their sign in my front yard and to compensate me they'd install a security system in our home. They started asking questions like how many doors do you have, do you have a sliding glass door, is there alot of people in the home.

    After refusing them, I looked up and down the street and am not sure how they got to my house because I didn't see any unusual cars. Scary
  • Home Secure
    After reading all these comments, I can only suggest one thing. This will certainly solve everything and we won't have to worry about ANY breakins. Just plan to take your home with you whenever you leave! I'm sure the airlines won't have time to check your entire home before it gets checked into the luggage area; and when you arrive at your destination, well, you'll have a place to stay! How fortunate for us! And at no extra cost!! AND, your pets can come too - no more boarding fees and lonely, mistreated babies .....they'll love the trip and will be so grateful you didn't leave them for showdowns in the neighborhood. Oh, and guess what? If you have a big house, your relatives can all jam themselves in there as well and travel free in the baggage compartment! Let's hear it for the new wave of PEOPLE TRAVELING WITH HOMES!! hip, hip, hooray!!!!
  • Nobody's home
    I like to let my lawn grow, toss a few rolled-up newspapers on my front porch, turn off all the lights and unlock the door. Then I stop taking my meds and wait in the dark with my favorite screwdriver. I haven't had any break-ins yet, but I'm hoping things will turn around next month.
  • Staying safe
    The gun talk is rash! A dog is a much better deterrent, and a trusty neighbor teenager can always let the dog out and feed and water it.
  • Home safety
    Here's a few other tips. If possible, try to get your spouse on a different work shift than yourself. This way someones almost always home. Try to not tell your kids when your going on vacation. They can't keep their mouths shut and will tell their friends. It's almost always someone you know who breaks in. Don't put your newspaper on hold. Cancel it altogether. You can always resign up when you return. Or the day before you return, call from where ever you are. Long distance is almost always free via cell phone. Absolutely have a gun if you are comfortable with shooting someone who wants to steal from you or harm your family. The leaving a ridio on idea is great. Try talk radio. It sounds more like someone is having a conversation. Take your phone off the hook. Many crooks call your home if they know the number. They let it ring and ring. If it's still ringing when they are ready to break in, they know you are gone. A dog is a good idea too, although there are drawbacks.
  • guns
    I have guns too! and a Dog to watch things when I'm gone!
  • Guns
    How do guns help if your not at home? Just one more thing for the bad guys to take.
  • Guns around home
    I have several guns around my home, hidden in "plain view", (I have no kids at home)I have a tactical mind and I am ready for any event that falls my way. I choose to be a Lion and not a Lamb, it's a mind set. When i call the police about a break in, it will be to come clean up the body of my burglar...no court system needed here, thatnk you tax payers.
  • Not just burglers
    I'm a housecleaner and nearly all my clients aren't home when I clean their house. So, I have access to the whole house. I have seen new credit cards, bank statements, cash (LOTS of cash), and other nice, pricey stuff around the house. I have keys to their house, garage door codes and security codes. People are very careless. I realize that anything misplaced or damaged will cause the client to think of me first, so temptation in gone! I clean other peoples' houses, but mine is always in need of cleaning. I need a housecleaner, but I don't want the liability of hiring someone dishonest.
  • Burglars at your door
    As a law enforcement officer it's always nice for people to get the best discription of individuals that "Notify you" there wll be thefts in your area. Get license plate numbers, times, direction of travel and most certainly a good description of everyone susicious. These will probably be the individuals coming back when your not home.
  • Money
    I'm a small time contractor and usually work by myself. One day as I was prepping for a remodel I came upon a "stash". The Lady was a widow. I called her and said..."You might want to move this. It was a box stuffed with cash and I won't tell you where it was. Another job was done in a condo. I was up on a ladder and could not believe all the rolls of coins,,,silver that were stacked all around the house. Lotsa money. And No I didn't even touch a roll.
    Mark
  • Burglars/alarm systems
    My local police captain told me this. When you leave your home, set the alarm, and that $5,000 front glass entry door leave it open, so when they break in you want have to replace it. The alarm is going off either way. Only keep it locked when you are there.
  • ALSO NEED TO KNOW
    3. Don’t trust anyone hanging around your door. Canvassers hanging fake flyers, the Avon Lady are safe; you can call and see if she really hung a book on your door. But the rest watch out. Hangers for pizza, carpet cleaning, etc. can’t verify they are real. I saw something rather frightening this past week. A crew leader for a canvassing company was hiring “seriously degenerated ghetto shopping cart pushing bums” to hang flyers in neighborhoods they otherwise wouldn’t have had easy access to. I took down the guy’s car license plate and business logo off the side of his car.

    4. Neighborhood Watch Programs. Sorry, this can go either way for you. Many unscrupulous individuals are members of the local Watch program. This gives them access to information on the neighbors: Phones, next of kin, are you on vacation? In the hospital? Neighborhood Watch only works if the people involved are honest, upstanding citizens. So, think about this one before you give out your information. My suggestion is to claim you rent when your really own. Yes, claim you are renting from yourself. Profession thieves often call county records offices to see who owns the property. So, if your name is Robert John Smith on the house, you may want to tell the neighbors your name is Bert John and you rent, or Bob John and you rent. Have the wife use a derivative of her name too. If your name is too hard to morph, and then say you are renting from an uncle. This may help prevent identity theft too.
  • Home Burglars
    For over 30 years I replaced the locks and repaired the broken in doors and windows on many an upset home owner after the robbery.

    Here are a couple of more things someone may want to know:

    1. The same rules apply to apartment and condo renters as home owners.

    2. If you are single woman, you may want to make it appear that a man lives with you. It could pay off if you can get a male member of your family to actually be on the lease with you, even if they don't live with you. That way, anyone getting into "office paperwork" sees a man in the unit rented. Put, dirty work boots, flannel shirts, "manly items" on and off your back decks front porches etc. Move them FREQUENTLY. Have very manly subscriptions to your unit, mags on guns, hunting, judo etc.

    2. Most complex apartment invaders actually live/lived there. (Current employees, past employees, former tenants, “friends of”) Directly ask if the unit locks are completely replaced after the previous tenants moved out. Many large complexes have duplicate keys, to duplicate locks in other units. How does this happen? Well, when the complex was built new, they purchased huge boxes of door knobs. These are passed out in order. However, if the unit is large enough duplication of locks and front doors starts to happen. Unit #1 and unit #17 may actually have the same duplicate door knob and key lock. This happens most often with the brands from do it yourself warehouse locks and doorknobs. Kwikset is the biggest offender of this duplication. Medico is the safest door lock made.
  • Another thing they won't tell you
    I'm afraid of being shot, but I'm not afraid of you calling the cops. I'll be outta there before they can get me.
  • home protection
    Brian, I have several handguns and rifles... but all are under lock and key. You might want to rethink your strategy of leaving unlocked, loaded firearms in every room... you might have a taker when you least expect it... not to mention the legal and moral liability of a juvenile finding one and using it. There are smarter ways of keeping a gun ready when needed.
  • Don't ever stop giving us advise
    love you clark
  • home protection
    I can shoot the jock strap off a misquito at 50 feet without drawing blood. anybody breaking into my house had better hope I am not home at the time. I have no kids at home now. There are loaded guns (a round in the chamber, safety on) hidden in most rooms of the house. Any takers?
  • When I had our alarm system installed Adt had to call in extra workers to help intall the alarm and the extra workers unlatched the window in the garage and pushed the window back down and locked it so nobody would notice. They knew we didn't install an alarm on the inside garage door into the house. The window really wasn't locked, it just looked like it. Thank goodness I noticed it before our family left to drive back to Georgia for Thanksgiving.

    Don't leave your upstairs windows open, even if it's on front of the house. I had a guy to clean out my gutters really cheap for me and he swung himself on to my lower roof from a tree branch. I never seen anyone do this before and it really opened my eyes to how fast someone can enter into your house if they wanted to.
  • Good Advice
    I will just leave on talk radio when I am out of town and YOU can scare the burglars away.. Im just kidding I love the show
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